Why Are You Here? | 30 Day Video Challenge 19 of 30

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by Melody Fletcher on May 19, 2017

There’s an exercise I do every year, called “The Big Why”. Basically, you explore the big reason you do what you do, why you’re here, what, when all the superficial stuff falls away, and we feel truly validated, and successful, and no longer NEED anything, really revs your engine. What gets you out of bed in the morning if you already are your best self, the grandest vision of you? It’s a great exercise, and I promise you, your Big Why is bigger than you think.

In today’s video, I talk about my Big Why and what it means to me, as an example of how to focus on your own Big Existence Motivating Force. Wahoo!

 

 

{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }

kelli cooper May 20, 2017 at 02:21

Hey Melody
Couldn’t sleep hopped online for a bit and I saw this in my inbox. I love what you are talking about here. Over time, I have found the concept of just being here experiencing the world from my own POV, being happy and contributing some good to the world in some way as my main ‘purpose’ and thinking how to best fulfill that function. It is common to feel pressure to ‘do’ something, to find that ‘predestined’ purpose and until you do, you are ‘wasting’ precious time. I think we are all drawn to different interests and passions and they are great signposts for what would make a more fulfilling life for us personally. I get great satisfaction from my blog and coaching, so that is where I direct a lot of my focus but I also try not to get too attached to all that or make that some core aspect of my identity. I want to help people and I think at least right now, that feels like the most natural way.
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Usha May 20, 2017 at 08:45

Great video as always. Looks like most of your videos are spot on answers to my questions. Actually the Big Why is the big question I’ve been asking myself for some time now. I’m a doctor and have done my bit for mankind. The superficial stuff has definitely fallen off . I don’t really NEED anything except perhaps the health and peace for my loved ones. I got my real passions mixed up and went into a profession I wasn’t really keen on but I did a pretty good job at it all my life. Now comes the Big Why? WHAT is my purpose now? I’ve retired and doing online consultations..not out of necessity but to keep myself sane, dabble in some painting … but I keep searching for a reason to spring out of bed in the morning and can’t find one. So can you tell me what’s happening here?

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Melody Fletcher May 20, 2017 at 15:22

Hey Usha,

You may still be trying to find a “purpose”. Ask yourself this – what is it that you most love participating in? What lights you up. Get out of the idea that it has to have “value”. So, for example, you may love the energy of creating art. You may love to participate in the energy of people’s healing journey (or not… lol). You may love the energy of dancing around joyfully in your underwear. That’s where you start. Resist the temptation to try and figure out how this will benefit the world or even your family. That will come, don’t worry. It’s always a win/win. But start with YOUR win, not their win on this one. It will lead the way. See if that helps.

Huge hugs,

Melody
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Isabel Martins May 20, 2017 at 08:47

My BIG why is to participate (and play with/assist my co-creator souls) in the re-empowerment of us all, loving human beings. I do the energy healing work I do and teach the energy tools I teach exactly with that in mind! It wasn’t always that clear, but it has been getting clearer and clearer.

My mission here, which I chose to accept (cue Mission (im)Possible tune ;) ), is to rediscover my own power as a Spirit and a soul focused on a physical body, and then shine that new way of being and new way of living to all that feel inspired to live that way too. So, working on myself and sharing my talents and knowledge on energy work is powered by my big why of living from an empowered state and in an empowered world, with empowered co-creators to play with. :)
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Melody Fletcher May 20, 2017 at 15:23

YAAAAAAAAS!!!

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Merwin May 20, 2017 at 11:34

I did an exercise a few years ago, where one author wrote a book on finding our WHY. He wasn’t a law of attraction teacher, but through that exercise and book, I thought my why was to help others in a certain way. It opened up my mind for a bit, and I felt some freedom and it served its purpose at that time. That probably the first time I was leveling up without realizing it. Your video today helped freed that sense of obligation that I thought I was supposed to feel. I thought if I wasn’t teaching or helping others, I wouldn’t be able to grow a business [a limiting belief I'm going to work on]. Now I realize I get to just play.

SO, my big why, or what I feel like it is through watching this video, is to travel and experience the world. I love traveling and have come to the realization a week ago that traveling gives me the sense of freedom and excitement that I realize money and wealth alone doesn’t give me. I get excited about exploring and I see it as a relaxing adventure. I play video games, and I’ve always gravitated towards the games where the character is on an adventure and gets to explore other countries or even worlds. Guess that could have been the Universe or my intuition trying to tell me something!

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Deb May 20, 2017 at 16:02

I’ve come across this notion of helping others multiple times on the internet, especially when it comes to empaths and generally positive people. “You’re there to light up the negativity”— ehh, not exactly. You’re so right about there being no obligation. That feels disempowering to me, and i’ve always struggled with that concept.

You do you! And the rest shall follow. Everyone is their own hero, I believe. =P

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Cordy May 20, 2017 at 12:11

“Or the World Cup, if you’re a normal football fan”. :) :) :) That made me laugh out loud.

Well… this might not sound very Shiny Puppy of me, but I think I am getting in touch with how I REALLY feel. Which I think – and I find this not-the-most-fun – is “not that great, a lot of the time”. I think I have had a strong tendency to fake feeling better than I felt for a number of years, under the guise of “being positive”. Realizing that I don’t feel that great a lot of the time is painful, but also a kind of relief.

When you asked “why do you get out of bed in the morning”, it gave me serious pause. Right now, I get out of bed out of various obligations. I think I would like to get out of bed because there were fun things I wanted to do. I think maybe I would like to do things just because they were fun! Not really even to help humanity. (I feel scandalized, just having this thought. Hehehe.)

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Melody Fletcher May 20, 2017 at 15:27

That’s a powerful realization to have Cordy. Well done. Waking up a bitch. But it gets better. :)
If all those obligations fell away, what would you get out of bed for in the morning? If all of those curtains drop and you just see your own light, what do you want to shine it on?

Also, Barca, Barca, Barca! Hehehehe.

Smooshy hugs,

Melody

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Mara May 20, 2017 at 12:31

Thank you all for your comments! I’m pretty normal! I feel passionless and hunting for what my passions might be, but my favorite thing is observing other people’s passion and joy and things I see them good at and proud of! I love living other people. I love being around people and watching them manifest and enjoy! I used to be jealous of others and compare and put myself down for not having what they have a recently I’ve realized I’m experiencing their joy and manifestations with them. I attracted them and I’m a part of it all. So I think my passion right now is loving other people’s passion! Maybe I can do more with this! It’s all new!

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Melody Fletcher May 20, 2017 at 15:28

That’s really beautiful Mara! Keep going!!

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Catherine May 20, 2017 at 17:35

My big WHY is to connect with myself and others. I used to be scared of people and considered myself shy, I definitely wasn’t having real, authentic conversations. But once I started being real with myself I began meeting the most amazing souls. I meet a lot of different people because of the work I do and the conversations I’m having with these people now are so touching and so raw and real it’s freakin’ amazing! And it just gets better and better every day.

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Oliver Piluski May 20, 2017 at 18:35

Think big, huh?
I’ve always felt my part in the universe is to create devices that help others heal. As a sort of healer myself, my machines are all over the world. I love the feedback I get when someone tells me their success story with them. I haven’t had too many yet, but I know in my heart that I’m on my path.

One recent example: catch a lightning bolt in a large tank on the top of a mountain!
Has anyone done this?

But this is a bit selfish, as I really want to create healing devices for anyone to use at anytime with my soulmate, wherever she is!

Best!
Ollie

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Lori Gosselin May 20, 2017 at 20:14

Hey Melody! I’ve been enjoying these videos but this was the one that inspired me to chime in mostly because my answer to your question surprised me and I wanted to share it. My why, it seems ???? is to do what I say I want to do, what I set out to do, overcoming the obstacles, rising to the challenges and enjoyable the success of it.
Thanks fir getting these wheels turning. Imagine enjoying obstacles and challenges. Who knew?!?
Lori

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bernie May 21, 2017 at 05:38

Hi Melody- i was smiling so much through this video today- love the imaginary of the Universal Games like the most amazing Soul gathering… it feels like a more beautiful world is emerging and I want to take part in that experience- by colouring my life my own way- and if people feel inspired along the way or tap into that joy the more the merrier-I know this isn’t on a day to day level always a sunny walk in the park- but that’s all part of it, and my focus is to do what feels good each step of the way and for those what want my guidance to share that perspective with them- so I guess I get out of bed each day because this life with all that it is – is still the most fascinating experience- and I can feel better more colourful- uncertain – certain- that I get to FEEL is why- and I trust I am meant to be here on earth right now to experience it all unfolding. Big hugs to you- Bernie x
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Mark Sims May 21, 2017 at 10:50

Hi Melody,
What a brilliant awakening video. it is only 2-3 weeks since coming across your blogs, and loving them. I am a LOA newbie so to speak, and loving it. (only able to manifest free coffee at Starbucks, but it’s a start !).
The Big Why though seems to be that BIG elusive thing. I know that after 2 years of being in a very bad place (mentally, Depression and that kinda shite). I wake up, I do my little meditation routine thing and feel great. I have a faint but really good feel good factor about the day, just a joy that I can’t put my finger on, then the “day starts proper” life..family…work. It’s not very long and that Big happy why has just dissolved in the murk. very hard to get a glimpse of that Big Why again …. :(

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Sim June 20, 2017 at 19:19

Welcome Mark. It’s like the Matrix and you’ve just swallowed the truth pill. Yay!!!

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BumbleBee May 21, 2017 at 11:45

Hi Melody,

The title of this one instantly caught my attention – I’ve recently been through a bad breakup with an ex-coworker whom’s work I had taken on before he made the decision to leave the job and myself behind. I’d moved to my current rented accommodation to be nearer to him and work, but now the workplace is just a ground of endless suffering for me – Not a day has gone by where his name has escaped my eyes and/or ears, management shows little empathy and my salary really doesn’t cover the workload I’ve carried, the rent I’m to pay nor the immense stress I’ve shouldered for the company.

Just over 3 months have passed since my moving day/his leaving day, and he has been in contact several times. Our mutual friends can’t understand his reasoning for this, considering he appeared to have moved on to someone else within a month of leaving me. I’ve since been living with an old friend who has been forced by default to take on the brunt of my anxiety attacks and highly unstable emotional state, and unfortunately I haven’t respected her own partner’s presence in our place since mine vanished, not out of envy but simple territorial issues, to the point where she wants the freedom for him to come and go as he pleases without our ’3 nights per week’ rule, meaning we won’t be splitting rent costs next year. Without a higher wage, this would mean I’m forced to move back home with my parents (my relationship with my father has been shoddy for several years, and part of the reason my partner and I had our ups and downs was due to lack of own place/privacy, since he’d lived in a shared arrangement as well).

Long story short, I’ve been doing much soul searching in my time of sheer lack of motivation, boredom and loneliness, and think my ‘Big Why’ has always been something to do with providing love and support to others. I’ve always enjoyed being the one people come to, feeling wanted/needed and being able to have an answer to a question, or simply just being a hug , shoulder or an ear for them. I want a partner and a loving family that I can defend and support emotionally, knowing that they can do the same for me if I ever need it again.

I have an interview tomorrow. And though it may not pay as well as I might need immediately, I’m hoping it will remove me from my current binds and be what I need when the time is right. But I put less pressure on it knowing that this move is a move I can always make again if it doesn’t fit me. I hope that this will be the first step to piecing my life back together.

Wish me luck and joy on my journey, I wish you well on yours :) Happy shiny puppy hugs xx

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Judy May 21, 2017 at 12:40

Being!

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Marsha May 23, 2017 at 03:14

Thanks, Melody, for these daily videos!

I watch them when I wake up, as they’re the first email in my Inbox. This weekend, though, I saved them up as I wasn’t feeling LoA-ish. This morning, I felt like catching up on the videos, starting with this (#19)…

Two minutes in, you mentioned ‘ascension.’ It resonated powerfully within me. I paused the video, and followed your suggestion to search for your 2016 series about the subject.

Wow.

I’m lying in bed right now, blown wide open by this, totally vibrating with the knowing that this is divine guidance, and so appreciative of you bringing it to my awareness.

You are a loving, lovely, luminous messenger! :) Literally, an Angel.

When you spoke of the symptoms (http://www.deliberateblog.com/2016/03/11/7-symptoms-of-ascension/), I recognized four that have caused me to oscillate dizzyingly between joy and confusion since Sep 2016, in this order:
1) massive changes
2) ascension flu
3) faster manifestations, both “good” and “bad” (even faster than the already-awesome ones I’ve grown accustomed to)
4) time dilation

I’ll continue watching now. I just could not wait to express my thanks!

Hugs,
Marsha

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Marsha May 23, 2017 at 03:16

P.S.
Before watching this video earlier, I discovered I needed to reschedule an errand for the day after tomorrow. Apparently, it’s a holiday in Stockholm called ‘Himmelfärdsdag’. I checked my Swedish-English dictionary: Feast of the Ascension. :)

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Jessica May 23, 2017 at 12:45

Hi Melody,

My big why in the present is loving and nurturing myself. I’m learning to nurture and have compassion for all my inner child parts (different ages and feelings) and other parts of myself I’ve been repressing. I do this through art therapy, dancing, journaling and whatever else any part of me comes up with to express itself. It’s how I play now. I know it’s what I’m here for now. I’m following my intuition and although I don’t need to do it for anyone else I can’t help but notice and be happy that my son benefits from the way I play.

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Kim May 23, 2017 at 23:10

Hi Melody,

Just had to chime in as this video really hit home for me, particularly with regards to the ‘Big Why’ not needing to be about being of service, helping others, etc (though admittedly I feel somewhat guilty saying that, lol). That’s all you hear about it seems as to the path to fulfillment, success, etc, blah, blah, blah. lol I’ve spent the last 18 years being a work-at-home mom, juggling working at home with family obligations, etc, and while I definitely chose that route, I’m really kind of over being of service to everyone else. haha

So it was a great relief to hear you say – and what I’ve been thinking myself for a long time despite most other teachings saying the opposite – that it’s not true, we’re not here to just be of service to others but to immerse ourselves in this experience of life – in whatever way that calls us! Ahhh…. that is so much more light to me.

So I’m not sure of my ‘Big Why’, but for now I know I love learning about becoming a deliberate creator and all that entails big picture-wise (along with seeing others coming to these same realizations) and I find the whole ascension concept resonates with me completely. I also absolutely love riding/connecting with horses – something I’ve been drawn to since I was little but only in the last few years been able to get involved with. It’s my absolute favorite thing to do – I could spend all day every day at the barn. My poor family. ;-)

Anyway, I’m still in the dark on how to live more true to these loves but no longer feeling like I need to keep searching for this ultimate purpose that helps the world in some way is a great relief so thank you!

Now I’m off to watch your ascension videos! :)

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JoAnne May 25, 2017 at 09:25

Oh, my gosh, love this. It’s funny, I wrote a blog post on this very same topic last night about the importance of going through this exercise and identifying and writing done and posting it in a visible place all the whys you are choosing to nurture your home business or digital income stream. Like attracts like, great job, subscribing to your youtube channel. I just completed my 1st 90 day video challenge earlier this year and am now working through a 100 day video challenge.
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H. June 5, 2017 at 13:59

:)

I want to participate in building peace. As in people’s empowerment and their ability to replicate what they have learned, with interesting high reaching insights and acess to info and care when needed, in building a peaceful world, where human rights violations are stuff from the past.

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