Awesome Alex asks: “What does it mean energetically when someone rejects you?”
Hey there Alex, essentially, it means that you were not a vibrational match. Or, more accurately, the other person was not a vibrational match to what you want. They WERE a vibrational match to some resistance you had (if there is no match at all, they cannot be in your reality). If you were rejected, perhaps you had a fear and/or negative expectation of rejection and this manifested.
Another way to look at this is to say that you took action before you aligned yourself vibrationally with what you wanted. So, it didn’t work out. If you wait until you’re inspired to action, you don’t even notice the girl who will reject you. You’ll only notice the one who’s a match to what you want. This is also a really great way to avoid psychos. Just saying…
I met a married man after my husband cheated. Why?!
Amazing Ana wants to know: “I have been married for 18 years and 5 years ago my husband cheated on me. The affair is finished but led to a baby. I must say that it’s been pretty hard for me, since I don’t have the courage to leave with my 3 children. It was really bad until my friend sent me to your blog. My question is: 5 months ago a new man has entered my life. It’s not an affair but emotions are there. He is married too. The problem is that I know how bad this can hurt because I was in the same situation. Since he’s been in my life, it’s like someone has taken this huge stone off my chest and I can breathe. Is it possible that I have attracted the same cheating husband as mine? I don’t want to think like this because he is good and kind. I have decided to leave my husband. When I’m with my husband, it’s a bad feeling. He says he loves me, but still, it feels bad. Please help me find the answer.”
My dear Ana, let me offer you a perspective you may not have thought of. Your marriage was over quite some time ago. You and your husband were no longer a match. It hasn’t felt good to you for some time, but as you said, you weren’t willing to leave with your three kids. You and your husband ignored the discord – the difference in your vibrations – so it manifested in bigger and bigger ways as it grew. Your husband had an affair, which even resulted in a baby. It doesn’t get much worse feeling than that, does it? And still, you stayed, but something changed. You reached a breaking point. You just didn’t want to feel this badly anymore and you let a glimmer of hope in. A friend sent you a life line – a link to a blog that you resonated with. This was a manifestation. You were seeking answers that would allow you to feel better, and you got them.
Then, you had another manifestation, due to the work you were doing. You were moving into a better feeling vibration and it lined you up with more solutions. A man came into your reality, a man who wasn’t available and didn’t need to be (because let’s be honest, at this point you’re not really ready for a relationship). A man who made you feel good again, made you light up, made you able to breathe. And in the light of that feeling, you finally decided that enough was enough. You’ve gathered your courage and decided to leave a situation that hasn’t felt truly good in a long, long time. That man didn’t come into your life so that you could have an affair, or because you’re somehow a magnet for unfaithful men! He came into your life to make you feel good, which was the perfect catalyst for you to make the decision to free yourself and your children from a bad feeling situation (and don’t think your kids don’t feel the discord, too. They always do.)
I know this is hard, but keep on moving into a better feeling direction. Listen to how you feel and if something feels bad, move away from it. As you do, more and more wonderful opportunities will show up and you’ll not only be able to breathe again, you’ll laugh and giggle with the best of the happy shiny puppies. You’re on your way and you’re doing a lot better than you think you are, my dear. Well done!
How did I manifest a mean breakup?
Lovely Laura wonders: “OK, so someone gravitates out of my life because our vibrations were no longer a match. During the relationship, he didn’t treat me well. When it’s over, it ended badly with lots of hate and anger and even a threat.
This is really a two part question.
1. If his vibration didn’t evolve, in the same way mine did or at the same rate, is it likely that he is off treating others in similar ways he treated me or was it my vibration that caused the bad treatment in the first place?
2. And as far as receiving even more mean and cruel treatment, while being “tossed to the curb”, which seemed to serve as reinforcing a non-negotiable ending of this relationship, how exactly if my vibe had evolved, that I was getting even MEANER treatment from the same person?”
Dearest, wonderful Laura. I’m sorry, but I have to call Bullshit. This man did not “gravitate out of your life”. He pried himself loose with a crowbar. When relationships end really badly like that, it’s almost always because someone (you) held on to the other person WAY past the relationship’s expiration date. And it’s generally the higher vibrational person who’s doing the holding on. Let me explain:
As you raised your vibration and your boyfriend didn’t, being with you would’ve become very uncomfortable for him. He would’ve either had to raise his vibration, too, or get away from you. Clearly, coming up to where you were and continuing to keep up with you was not an option for him, so he started to distance himself. And that would’ve been fine, only you, for some reason, didn’t let him go. I’m willing to bet money that as he started to shift out, you reacted by clinging on tighter instead of just letting him go. This is incredibly common (you are SO not alone in this). Of course, if someone is trying to leave and you won’t let them, they get quite agitated, then panicky and eventually, they just turn into the equivalent of a feral animal. You’re holding on to someone who is no longer a vibrational match to you, who does not have the ability to rise to your level and who is actively trying to get away from you. Your holding on to them is increasing their discomfort. So, they try harder and harder to make you let them go. They get nasty, horrible, unfair, all in an attempt to make you give up.
In a sense, you did elicit his horrible behavior from him. His lower vibration caused him to be able to be that nasty, but the situation also had something to do with it. Poking a bear is not the same as poking a kitten. But you still did the poking, my love.
Why would the bad treatment continue after the breakup was official? Because you can hold on to someone vibrationally. Only when you truly let him go can he totally gravitate out of your experience. Let him go. He’s not a match to the relationship you’re ready for. But if you don’t release him completely, you’re holding yourself back from being a match to that magnificent love you’ve always wanted. You deserve so much better. Free yourself from this self inflicted bondage and go get ‘em girl! Bowchicabowow.