How People Still Manage To Manifest What They Want While Bitching and Complaining

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by Melody Fletcher on November 29, 2011

It’s time for another Q&A Video, where I answer your questions about the Law of Attraction.

Today’s question comes from a reader who wants to know:

“Why is it that ungrateful people usually get what they want, or get good things happening for them? It’s like bitching and complaining is a full time job for them. I’m not saying they don’t work for what they want, but it seems that when they complain about not having something they usually get it and don’t realize it. I know the LAW OF ATTRACTION is at work here with people like this, but I myself just can’t do this…”

Watch the video to see and hear my answer:

Video Highlights:

  • Bitching and complaining does NOT get you what you want.
  • You may see people who are bitching and complaining AND getting what they want. But it’s not because of the bitching and complaining. If you follow that logic, you could see a skinny girl eating a donut and conclude that eating donuts makes you thin.
  • There are way more variables at work. You cannot judge someone else’s experience and vibration. You can only see your point of view.
  • Of course there are people who are bitching and complaining who get what they want. It’s possible to create and receive your reality without doing so deliberately. If this mechanism wasn’t in place, none of us would be here.
  • Deliberate Receiving is simply about getting to where you want to go faster and with a lot less effort. But it’s entirely possible to receive some of the things you want, even while bitching and complaining.
  • This is because no one complains 100% of the time. Everyone sleeps, gets drunk, plays with a puppy. During those times, when you’re not doing something to hold down your vibration, your energy rises and you align with what you want. Over time, that will allow some of the things you want to trickle in.
  • If someone isn’t aware of something they’ve attracted, then it’s not in their experience! If you have a million dollars in an account that no one told you about, it’s not part of your experience. Things can be right in front of you, and others can even see it, but if you don’t align your energy with it, you’re not going to “receive” it.

Do you have a Law of Attraction Question? Ask away by clicking HERE and I’ll do my best to answer you ASAP in a blog post or video.

Now it’s your turn: let me know your thoughts in the comments. This stuff is a lot more fun if I hear back from you. :)

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jim syyap November 29, 2011 at 19:20

We probably think “they” are getting what they want, but isn’t that from our perspective? Everything is a reflection. It is simply us seeing them get what we want. It’s contrast.

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Melody Fletcher November 29, 2011 at 20:06

Hi Jim!

Welcome to Deliberate Receiving! You’re absolutely right. We can’t ever know what’s going on in someone else’s experience. So, we can’t know if they’ve gotten what they wanted (maybe they have what WE want??). Great point and glad to have you here.

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Riley Harrison November 29, 2011 at 21:24

Hi Melody,
First of all I want to wish you belatedly a very happy birthday. You are the premier spokesman for the Law Of Attraction concept. Seriously I don’t think anyone explains it as well or as effectively as you do. Everything that you advocate is consistent with all the good psych and neuroscience research that I’ve discovered.
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Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 01:18

Hi Riley,

Thank you so much for the wishes and for your wonderful words! I’m glad to hear that science is finally catching up, LOL.

Huge hugs to you,
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Mary Carol November 29, 2011 at 22:47

Happy Birthday, Melody! Love the bling!

Fun video. Thanks!

Two questions: (1) How do sleeping dreams and nightmares fit into the LOA? Last week I had a lovely calm, way happy day, and that night I had an anxious, yucky nightmare, seemingly out of nowhere, so bad I woke up to get away. Weird. The next night I dreamed that George Clooney and I were best friends, enjoying a lovely dinner on a boat somewhere – a much more normal dream for me! According to LOA, do dreams tell us something? Is the mechanism understood?

(2) more of a comment: Not-seeing-what-you-have makes me think of the romantic scenario where the girl finally realizes she’s madly in love with her best friend. So true it’s become a cliche.

Once again, thanks for the written commentary – helpful for us visual learners. Hugs,

Mary Carol
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Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 01:22

Hi Mary Carol,

Thank you my dear. I love the bling, too. :)

Ok, the dream issue is understood, but requires its own blog post. I shall write that up ASAP.

That scenario is perfect – when someone has been in front of you all the time but you couldn’t see him, it’s because you weren’t quite aligned with the energy of what you wanted. As soon as you are, BAM, there he is! This is why in the movies and stories the girl goes through some kind of event, some kind of learning (usually brought on by the “cool” asshole who treats her like crap and makes her realize a few things…) just before she has her epiphany.

You’re so welcome. Notice, I stopped saying it was for the lazy… :P

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Bryan Thompson November 29, 2011 at 22:47

I love the Charlie Sheen picture at the start of this. :) Great job on the video! You have a really great blog, Melody!
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Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 01:24

Thanks Bryan! I struggle to find images that are culturally relevant across the board. I don’t watch TV and only get some gossip peripherally, so I often have no idea what people are talking about when they refer to famous people. I googled images for “crybaby” and all these sports stars came up that I’d never heard of. The downside of being on an information diet… This is why I prefer to use animals. LOL!

Thanks for your wonderful words.

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patricia November 29, 2011 at 23:11

Wow Melody what a fun video – I have a relative who is so focused that she gets everything she wants – that is her high – because in real life she is mean and ugly to other people. She relates better to money and not spending it – She calls it saving :)

When I was younger I was jealous…now I can see that the neglect paid to other aspects of life, such as meaningful connections with her children and grandchildren, is playing out in a way that I would not be comfortable with at all. Sometimes time is a truly great teacher :)

I am having trouble hearing your last 2 videos…I push the volume all the way up and and have my sound button on the computer all the way up and I have to focus, focus to hear you…

You do look lovely and blingy for your birthday! Happy Happy – make it last the whole month! ( My mum’s birthday is the 29th She would have been 98 today…I am in the birthday mood – Oh my! I think I need cake now!)
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Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 01:28

Hi Patricia,

Thanks so much for your kind words. See? This is what I’m talking about! :) Thanks for sharing your own personal experience here. I would say perspective is a great teacher and time often brings perspective.

Not sure what’s going on with the volume. It all sounds normal to me. Do you have the same issues with other Youtube videos, or just mine?

I love birthdays – mine and other people’s. I had a fantastic time with friends (just a really nice dinner, kept it really low key this year, but it was perfect).

Huge hugs to you,
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Tinu November 30, 2011 at 02:33

Happy Belated Birthday Melody. You look fab as always.
Love the video post/log, yet another clarification.
I spend way way too much time on what or how I feel I need to act or think, when really taking a step back and let the universe do it’s work, rather than keep loading it with all sorts of thoughts, requests and desires, Finding a “past time or hobby” or something fun aside from meditating that is, would also raise my vibration, I think too much…….
Thank you
Wish you continued strength

Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 19:36

Hi Tinu,

Thank you so much for your kind words and wishes. :)
It doesn’t have to be anything really active. Go sit in a park and read a book, walk around town with your iPod and just zone out. Those work just as well. Treat yourself in some way (something just for you). I’ll even get into a meditative state while cleaning the house. And my favorite way to get the brain to shut up: Naps. Wonderful naps. YAY!

Huge hugs,
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Sylviane Nuccio November 30, 2011 at 06:24

Hi, it’s my first time here! I found you on Fred’s blog.

That is so true, bitching and complaining will not get you where you want, however, it might get you in a worse situation. That’s the law of attraction. Before I bloged about it I can say that I studied it both ways from the right side and the wrong side as well.
Great video!
Thanks for sharing :)
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Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 19:39

Hi Sylviane!

Welcome to Deliberate Receiving! You’re so right – bitching and complaining will keep you focused on what you don’t want, which will attract more of that. But… it’s still possible to get some of what you want, even with all the complaining. It’ll just happen MUCH slower (cause the complaining keeps fighting it off…)

Glad you found your way here!

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Angela Smart November 30, 2011 at 09:29

Hey Melody. I just wanted to say Happy Birthday!!!! I love the Charley Sheen picture, it’s a great touch :)
It’s true that bitching and complaining does NOT always get you what you want. I liked your video. I agree with everything you say. Unfortunately not everyone is in such a great place all the time. You think you could make a post about how to get over a breakup fast? I would love that right about now.

Angela Smart

Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 19:41

Thanks Angela!

You’re in luck. I already wrote that post. You can find it here:

See how the LOA works? Ask and BLAM! There it is. Ha!

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Alex Mangini November 30, 2011 at 19:05

Awesome video, love the picture as well. :D

I know there are mixed views on this, but I was in New York City the other day and it just amazes me how some people can go around begging for money and food, and giving you reasons why you should help them. Sometimes they get helped, but most of the time they get nothing.

I understand some people do it out of disability, but most of them have got to just be lazy, and I think should be shown this post!
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Melody Fletcher November 30, 2011 at 19:56

Hi Alex!

Welcome to Deliberate Receiving. In my view, people who are begging for food are coming from a place of extreme disempowerment. The idea that you no longer have the ability to prove for yourself at all and are at the total mercy of strangers must be extremely painful. They are doing the best they can from where they are. I think even those who aren’t doing it out of need but out of laziness (and they certainly exist) aren’t in a good place. They’ve decided that to exist has to be enough. Going for more is too risky, to painful a prospect.

This is why I always use my intuition when deciding if I should give money or not. I can’t possibly rationally know if my money will help or hurt. I don’t care if people spend it on drugs or alcohol (if I was living on the street, I’m sure I’d self-medicate, too), but I do care if I’m doing more damage than good. My intuition lets me know when to keep walking.

Thanks so much for coming by!

Huge hugs,
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marc van der linden December 1, 2011 at 07:16

Hi Melody,

Being bitchy and complaining brings you exactly more of that. I totally agree. The only positive effect of complaining is that it means that you don’t repress your feelings. But there are many better ways to do deal with negativity.

Thanks for sharing
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Melody Fletcher December 1, 2011 at 17:39

Thanks Marc!

There sure are better ways, and ways that will get you where you want to go much faster. But… to each his own. Who are we to judge the crybabies, eh? :D


Libby December 1, 2011 at 11:13

Fab blog- loved the video too.. right on!( See, IM not complaining!! :) )
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Melody Fletcher December 1, 2011 at 18:01

Hi Libby,

thanks girl! Appreciate you stopping by!

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Jimmy December 1, 2011 at 12:10

Happy Birthday Melody. Sorry I am late. But better late then never.

Thanks for bringing some clarity to this issue about getting things even though people are negative. I have always been quite puzzled by this. There is that little bit of jealousy and envy in me whenever I see such people.

I guess that’s not good for our own vibrations.
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Melody Fletcher December 1, 2011 at 17:41

Thanks Jimmy!

I enjoy the wishes no matter when I get them. :)

Exactly – being jealous is a sign that you have a bit of a belief in scarcity – you think that if they have it, you can’t have it, too. Read my posts on the Economic crisis (I’ll link to Part 1 below). They address this very issue.

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Sol | Some Insight Required December 1, 2011 at 15:18

Ooh, you were certainly more ‘blinged’ up there, Melody!

Nice to hear your voice again regardless. You reminded me of one of those show hosts.
Still, I liked the video. You have a great personal touch. Plus, you’re so pretty!

Ii’ve never once experienced that I got my desires by bitching and complaining, but I did notice people having what I wanted – and not in the synchroncicity way.

Happy birthday, Melody! Sorry that I’m late, but better late than never, right?
Aww, I wish I could hug you! Accept this internetz – hug!

Oh and a bit of shameless self – promotion here: I’ve got a FB page for Some Insight Required now, and I’d be very happy if you could Like it, even if you can’t/don’t read the blog very often.

All my best to you and kick – ass video. The pink sweater went well with the background.
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Melody Fletcher December 1, 2011 at 17:46

Thanks so much for your kind words, Sol. LOL. In the business, we call that getting more “polished”, ha, ha.

I gladly accept your hugz and I hugz you right back. :D

Well ahead of you chica! I already liked your FB page and I stop by your blog all the time (I just recently left you a comment) :) So, um, there! He, he.

Thanks again for all the kind words.

Huge hugs, or hugz,


Sol | Some Insight Required December 2, 2011 at 00:15

Oh, I see. Accept my apologies and thank you!
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Melody Fletcher December 2, 2011 at 04:45

No worries Sol! I’m happy to be connected with you. :)


Sara December 2, 2011 at 01:44

:-D , funny you chose Charlie Sheen as the bitching crybaby, awkwardly being the all time winner! ( the way, your commented pics are always diaphragmatic demanding to me..)
The figure of Charlie Harper actually impressed me, as it emphasized so relentlessly the chronic downfalls of his counterpart Alan (who I deeply emphatized with, and with whom´s hopeless battles I could indentify with).
I can remember one episode when Charlie faced bankruptcy and didn´t even got any concerned of the situation, not to speak of panicked, while Alan pressed every button to get into control of it…, what availed him nothing but the toxic side effects of an uninvestigeted new drug, while for Charlie the situation turned out to be a steppingstone to a new desirable career – epic!
Sure, Charlie ultimately didn´t benefit from his nature, and Alan is doomed to drag himself around for the rest of his life, and the LOA doesn´t give a shit about benefits or doom, as it´s just employed as our own private enforcement officer – puhh.

Anyway, I´d prefer to fool around more while getting more of all the good stuff – like the Charlies in this world, as it seems! ;-)

Melody Fletcher December 2, 2011 at 04:44

LOL Sara. I hadn’t actually thought of the show. I’ve never seen 2 1/2 Men… I was thinking more of the actor, ha, ha.

Fooling around and having fun isn’t wrong. I do the same thing. But I try to do it consciously. I think there’s fooling around and having fun, but having your eyes open, and then there’s avoidance, which means we’re not dealing with negative feelings that are running underneath. I prefer the former. It tends not to bite me in the ass… :D


Steve December 2, 2011 at 05:19

I agree that bitching and complaining don’t get you want you want. I knew this girl that would use the bitching and complaining method to get what she wanted from people. In one case, she had a pizza place hang up on her…twice. In another, she got to use a coupon in a restaurant when it didn’t really apply. I guess it does seem to work part of the time. To me, it isn’t worth being seen as a person like that. I’d rather just not do it.
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Melody Fletcher December 3, 2011 at 01:55

Hi Steve,

You make an interesting point. Bitching and complaining doesn’t just point you away from what you want, it makes you, well, a whiny little bitch. Ha! Yeah… I don’t want to be seen that way, either. Although, I suppose I’d revisit that if it actually did get results. The point is that people sometimes get results IN SPITE of being crybabies, not BECAUSE of it. :)

Thanks for stopping by!

Todd | Channelingmyself December 3, 2011 at 07:28

Hi Melody,

Happy belated birthday. I’ve always wondered about those people who always seem to get what they want no matter what. It was a great explanation you gave. I certainly hope i have a few hundred million dollars in an offshore account just waiting for me! :)
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Melody Fletcher December 3, 2011 at 18:40

Hi Todd,

Thank you! I’m glad this post was useful to you. Well, you know what? I think that energetically, we all have millions of dollars in “offshore” accounts. Now, we just have to find the right frequency or numbers. :o )


Anish December 9, 2011 at 19:52

Hi Melody (my first visit and comment on your blog)
Great video. Thanks for such clear explanations. This was one of few questions I thought of too after watching some videos of Abraham Hick on Law of Attraction. It does make perfect sense to me now. I’ll make sure I e-mail you my other questions soon :) Oh and hope you had a great birthday. :)

Looking forward to reading more from you!

Best regards,
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Melody Fletcher December 11, 2011 at 18:44

Hi Anish,

Welcome to Deliberate Receiving!

Thanks for your great feedback. I’m so glad this video was helpful to you. I look forward to your questions. :)

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kelly September 23, 2013 at 01:57

Dear Melody first I would like to say I love love love your views and your blog!! that said could the reason that people that bitch still get what they want be because bitching makes them happy they don’t see it as nasty so there vibration don’t lower ?

minnie October 29, 2013 at 13:52

I have observed for a lengthy period of time ungrateful and negative ppl (and yes, you can be bitchy and negative even in your sleep, my mother is 1000000% negative in every millisecond of her life, even in her sleep and my sister has always had everything going for her and is still the most ungrateful being ive ever seen) and i have come to this conclusion: ppl who bitch and moan about what they dont get, are in a mindset of receiving it, because they think that they are entitled to it. they think that it is owed to them. they think that other ppl’s will or circumstances should bow to the “moaner”‘s expectations and demands. they are already in the mindset of allowing what they want in their existence. they get upset because “how dare it not be here right now?” but they never once doubt that they are entitled to it, and that creates a mindframe of not only allowing to manifest, but to demand the manifestation to be instant. they take it as a given fact that they should have what they want. they are never insecure. they think that everything should be happening for them, and that is why they are so ungrateful and never even thank whoever made possible for what they want to come to their lives. have you ever heard such a person give thanks to the universe, or god, or to whomever, for the good things they receive? no! they consider it a given that they are entitled to everything, so why should they thank anyone? and because they not only allow for good things to happen to them, but they are never insecure and they never feel unworthy of receiving them, they allow everything good to manifest in their lives. hope that makes sense?

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